Personal Atonement

A few days ago, I rolled my last mile of the year. My goal was 14,000 miles. My usual end of the year blog posts consists of a detailed breakdown of my seasonal mileage and what steeds saw what miles. However, this year the final post is a little different.

I felt a little like Forest Gump as I reached my goal. I simply stopped and looked around, and thought to myself, “I’m kind of tired, I think I’ll stop riding and go home now”. And at that, my year of riding was complete. I am indeed tired, not so much physically, but mentally.

There is a short two mile loop that myself and a few other mileage junkies go to round up our miles at the end of a ride. We commonly refer to it as the Champs-Élysées. I found it only fitting to head out to this ritualistic spot to finish the year and do some soul-searching for next year. As I rolled lap after lap I reflected on the year behind me. So much had changed for me in a matter of a year, some of which was for the good and some of which was the complete unforeseen.

There is a quote from the epic Mountain Bike film Roam that I have always found to be metaphorically fitting to my approach to cycling. It says, “On a mountain bike, you can travel a great distance in a short amount of time, or a short distance in a great amount of time.” This past year I have traveled many great distances but I have also experienced the paralyzing sudden halt that can ensue when your world dramatically changes in a way you never even considered a possibility. All in all, I believe I maintained forward motion to the best of my ability.

When you throw away wattage numbers, mileage accumulation, time tallying, race results, bike weight, and all the other finite measurements that attract us to the sport you are left with simply the ride and the journey. When broken down, what I take away most from this sport is the value in the journey. I have learned many important lessons this year about myself, my world, how I interact with the world, and the race itself.

Typically, this time of year would be fueled by whatever race results or personal accomplishments I am aiming at for the upcoming season. However, I feel I have changed my perspective going into the 2010 season. What I am most eager for is to apply those lessons I have learned from the past and embrace the journey this year. I am quite confident that if the journey is the main focus, the results will simply fall in line.

So I guess its officially that time again…MONKHOOD. My private war starts today. I’ll see you all at the start line.

Envy

Sometimes when I read blogs of fellow riders who live in 4-season cycling environments I am envious. I’m envious that they never have to take 45 minutes just to weatherproof themselves before they go out and ride during the December-March months. I’m envious that they never have to worry about numb fingers and toes and the ever-looming ominous threat of frostbite. And I’m envious that they don’t need a bike dedicated simply to the salty icy conditions and probably don’t even own studded tires.


Today I rolled 82 miles of snow-covered winter wonderland landscape. The miles were slow and arduous and mentally therapeutic. I feel bad for those riders who have never got to experience a day like today.