I'm not exactly sure how to put this, but...

In tune with my recent infatuation with all things Ron Burghandhy, Angela had this little surprise cotton treat sent to me yesterday.

Only one ball deep in humiliation.

9-7-and 1 is the current Sex Panther's record after last night’s bout against Ballzdeep (2nd place in the league). We just barely snuck in a win in the first game. However, one of our balls was buried deep in the garden of humiliation as we fell apart in the second game losing by a fairly large margin.

The team is currently setting our sights on the playoffs with great hopes for a Cinderella story.

Never let them out number you!

Yesterday Angela and I took my three nephews to C.J. Barrymore’s to celebrate Conner’s (the middle son) birthday. We played a rousing game of putt putt and then hit the track for some 5hp action. I think I ran a pretty good race but Conner was able to get a lap up on the field. In retrospect, I regret not putting him in the wall early on in the race and establishing dominancy.


In all honesty, these guys wore me out. My brother and his wife are out numbered for the rest of their lives by these boys. I may complain about overlapping race schedules and not getting my total daily desired training hours in, but these two are in the trenches everyday. Band aids, juice boxes, dirty socks, laundry, bathing them, feeding them, driving them to events, constant states of surveillance, antibiotics, doctor’s appointments, toys, batteries, schooling, birthday parties, etc…the list of responsibilities is intimidating and overwhelmingly long!

So, although my brother Don does not ride or race a bike avidly…he still receives the “Who Cares? I’m Flying” award this week for keeping up with his three high-octane boys.

So let’s all tip our glasses of pedialyte to Don…”Who Cares? You’re Flying”!

Ciaciaro Race Report: The End is Nearing…

Ciaciaro was like a breath of fresh air this week after the punishing I took last week by the RFGs (Really Fast Guys).

Feeling particularly good, Ray and I decided we wanted push the pace from the get-go. I attacked and headed up a break on the second lap. We had four teams represented. As a result, the gap became very sizeable quite quickly. After about 1/2 hour of pace line work we began to see the back of the field and hopes of lapping the group began ensuing.

Then it happened…



Kroske crashed with two other guys in the field. The field was immediately neutralized. Rumors speculated the speed was around 30mph when it occurred. I stared in panic as I watched my fellow teammate lay lifeless on the ground for about ten minutes. However, Scottie finally got up and was not able to finish the race but walked away from the scene with nothing more than some severe road rash and a few thousand dollars worth of damage to his already decrepit steed.


I’m not sure if the other riders were as lucky? They left in an ambulance.

The race was restart after about 40min. of medical mayhem. Our break was given 25 sec. to start with a remaining hour race time. Quickly, we began to see the back of the field again, it seemed that we had not lost much momentum. Two primes were called and I won them both. However, the breaks organization then began to diminish. At 6min. left in the race we were caught! It seems I am always a bride’s maid, but never a bride.

The race ended in a sprint finish and naturally Danielle D. took the win.

Coincidently, at the start of the day I was in 4th overall for the sprinter’s classification of the series. I do believe that with the primes I picked up this race, I am now tied for 2nd. This is quite ironic, seeing as I am NOT a sprinter; all of the points were acquired in breakaways.

Finkelstein Endorsed Products to BEAT THE HEAT:

I figure if Oprah can shamelessly plug products, than so can I!

For those who are ignorant to the powder that could potentially solve the world’s problems, well here it is. However, those who are unitiated to it’s powers, exercise caution. Gold Bond is not for the weak of heart! What it will do: Make a man out of you by cooling off your manhood with an effervescent menthol delight. Pick up a bottle today and the heat will suddenly become more tolerable; a must have for the season.

I have been a Common lover since the days of Resurrection. His beats and rhymes have been very therapeutic in low times and high times of my life. In Finding Forever, which dropped Tuesday, Common does it again with his genius metaphors, uncompromising flows, and straight up dedication to all things that epitomize true Hip Hop. As with virtually Common’s entire catalogue, upon first listen of Finding Forever, this album instantly was filed into the “timeless classics” genre of my musical psyche.


Pick it up today…but beware, your head will be bobbing so hard you may get whiplash!

It Happened Again! “A Beer”: As Mythical as a Big Foot or Loch Ness Monster

Will Power?…It seems I lack it! After only getting 3.5 hours of sleep last night due to the RO Brewery endeavor, I was dragging today! I debated whether or not I should even ride. However, I decided “sitting on” the B-Ham ride would serve me well as recovery from last week’s racing binge.



7:45- Ray Dybowski: Hey Tim, lets go to Dick O Dows and have a quick one after the ride
Me: I don’t Know? I have a lot to do
Ray: Come on, it’s only one…I’M BUYING!
Me: You had me at I’m buying

7:55: Arrive at Dick O Dows with the usual suspects (Andre Sotile, Ray D., Scottie K, Bruce Rivera, and Rob Akers=Beer #1
8:30: Still at the bar= Beer #2
9:00 Beer #3
9:30 Two servings of French Fries=Beer #4
10:10 Leave bar only to pick up a Cop on Bike escort filled with a multitude of questions of why 4 grown men in lycra were riding expensive bikes in the dark. At one point we were wondering whether or not we were going to have to out run an officer.
10:50 Arrive at home safely. Absolutely nothing accomplished for the night…man I love the summer!

Come on, let’s just have one…

I actually have to work Monday through Thursday of this week and the next. Somehow it seemed like a good idea in May to sign up for some extra salary supplement by substitute teaching for some of my district’s year round programs. I’m not sure how all of you do this “work thing” in the summer. I only have to work eight days and it is misery. In case anyone hasn’t noticed, it is warm and beautiful outside…why are you working at a desk?

So after a week of 330 miles of racing I decided to ride the Monday night recovery ride out of American Cycle and Fitness, Royal Oak. About half way through the ride I was excited to see the German Kaiser Alex in attendance. When he spotted me, he quickly proposed the idea of “a beer” at Royal Oak Brewery after the ride. I had a lot of TCOBing I had planned to do post ride, but I had not seen Alex in awhile. Reluctantly I agreed. It is now 11:30, I just got home from the 6:50 ride and had quite a difficult time keeping my bike straight on the way home. Needless to say, the concept of “A Beer” does not exist, especially when you are in the company of the borthers Chase, Hermit-Man, Pat and Kristen, Alan Smith, and the biggest Hasselhof fan you have ever met!

Taming the Black Bear

Last year was my virgin experience at The Black Bear.

Things the Black Bear does NOT provide:
-A Large Prize Purse
-Glory and Fame
-A sizeable field containing many seasoned racers
-Chicks

Things the Black Bear DOES provide:
- A day of “no pressure” all out fun racing
- Obligatory Beer Drinking Preparation
- A chance to race with many friends and acquitences who are of different race categories
- A chance to race against canoes and HPV’s (human powered vehicles)

As soon as I finished this race last year, I could not wait until the next year I could race it, so we ventured up to Grayling again. This year, Luke Cavender had dreams and aspirations to win this race. I knew if the race came down to a filed sprint Luke could win it blind folded so I did my best to contain every break that went out the day to ensure we stayed together. The plan went exactly according to plan. Luke ended up with a “the big W” and I in fourth.

Last year we rolled the 100 mile race in a time of just over 3hr and 52min. My main goal this year was to beat this time. However, due to a head wind and some uncooperative riders in the field, we rolled in at 3 hr and 58 min.

Home Sweet Home

It’s always a bit difficult to return back home from a long racing binge. Although we were only gone for five days, we started reaching that point where we felt we were living the life of a “professional” cyclist; in essence: the “Who Cares? I’m flying” mentality. I think anyone who ever swings their leg over a bike and musters up the gumption to race a bicycle has the fleeting thought somewhere in their subconscious that maybe one day this could lead to a professional career. Throughout the trip I never thought once about work, bills, yard work, student loans, mortgage payments, etc. For a short time, I was just a bike racer…that was the essence of my existence for about five days.

Who Cares? I’m Flying!

By far Superweek’s most notable finish goes to Brent Delrosario! After much discouragement from not even finishing any races something clicked in Green Bay and Brent discovered his “ness”. At the bell lap in the Cat. 4 race, Brent decided he was going to sneak away from everyone and win this race in true champion form. This was Brent’s first win! What a place to do it! Helmets off to Brent!

330 Miles of Racing in one Week!

We left Sunday the 22nd for the Superweek Pro Tour. I was definitely in good company: Alan Smith, Ray Dybowski, Scott Kroske, Luke Cavender, Greg Christian, Ben Renkema, Brent Delrosario, Maia Orabi, John Coyle, and Kelly Paterson all participated in our week’s travels.

At times, we were probably a little closer than desired. I learned a lot about my fellow teammates; bowel patterns, sleeping habits, pheromone emissions, and many other things that I never really wanted to know about.



Monday July 23rd Holy Hill Road Race. Length: 160k Field Size: 160+

Intimidation hit hard when the Rock and Republic team pulled up.


This race is always a pure race of attrition. If you finish, then you will most likely be in the money. That is exactly what happened this year. I rolled in at 32nd, just in the money. I was pleased with my finish and stoked to start the crit racing the next day.

Other notable finishes included:
Alan Smith: Cat. 3 12th place
Greg Christian: Pro 1/2 23rd Place
Ray Dybowski: Masters 30th place


Tuesday July 24th Cedarburg Criterium. Length 100k 130+ starters (NRC Race)

Last year I got dropped from this race in the first ten laps. My goal was to finish it. I hung in for 1-hour 54min only to get popped with about 12 minutes left in the race due to unbearable hot spots in my feet. Although I would of loved to finish the race, I was very pleased with my performance. Kudos to Ben Renkema for solidifying a respectable 17th place.

Wednesday July 25th Green Bay Bellin Health Criterium. Length 100k 130+ starters


I finished this race last year in a breakaway after several riders had already lapped the field. As a result, I was confident that I could hold strong in this race and possibly be a decent finish contender.

I bridged to a break early in the race. Unfortunately, it did not last. On the bell lap, there was a crash in turn 1 (including Ben Renkema). I was very lucky to avoid going down, but as a result was the victim of a huge field gap. I rolled in a 52nd place. Luke Cavender was able to respectively sprint himself to 20th place…in the money baby!


In fact, every Wolverine who graced Superweek this year went home with at least one check. At one point in a Pro 1-2 race, the announcer described the WSC as “An American Institution of Cycling”!

* Check out the WSC Men’s Elite Team Blog for more detailed results.

We decided to stay in Wisconsin Wednesday night and celebrate a week of great times and racing.

Thursday morning we set out back home on a voyage that ended up taking about 10 hours.

I got back just in time to accompany Robert Herriman to the Incubus concert at DTE Energy that night. As always, DTE provided great people watching! One notable thing: DTE now serves Lienekugel’s Sunset Wheat, and Blue Moon!…No more watered down Bud Light!

Memiors of Mania!

Whoa! What a month it has been…I’m not sure where to start?

I was starting to get a defeated feeling about two weeks ago. It happens to all of us. I had been racing with marginal results and starting to get that “burn out” feeling. Questions of why I ride bikes started streaming through my thoughts constantly.

July 19th brought me my umpteenth 7th place finish at Ciacaro. I’ve conceded to the fact that no matter who is in the field…if it comes down to a sprint finish at Ciacaro, I am taking 7th; its all I’m good for, I’m sorry.

July 20th did not help much when the Sex Panthers ended up balls deep in humiliation in their double-loss against Ballzdeep (Second in the league).

The following Saturday I raced the Fenton Road Race and felt as if I was merely a participant. I had not felt that bad in a race all year! The entire race I had dead legs and an extremely full bladder…I was lucky to finish with the field. Ray D. called me after the race and stated the following: “You have about 5-6 weeks of racing left this season…I don’t know what you have to do, but you better find a way to put yourself together and make something special happen before the end of the season. I’ve gone into September before with nothing but a bunch of races under my belt and it doesn’t feel good…I don’t want that to happen to you”.

I was starting to wonder whether or not I really even wanted to go to Superweek.

However, after I spoke with Ray D. I went home and watched Anchor Man: The Legend of Ron Burghandy and something in my mind snapped and took a turn for the better. I realized “I’m not sure how to put this, but I kind of a big deal…people know me”.


In true Finkel form for proper race preparation, I decided to throw a last minute bash at my house Saturday night. The turn out was good. The invitation via text message read “I’m having a party tonight…I don’t know how to put this but it is kind of a big deal”. Hours later, flocks of friends showed up at my doorstep armed with barley juice and wondering what my big announcement was. Many were dissapionted to discover I had no big announcement, I had simply watched Anchor Man one too many times over the past few days.

Ahh yes, the Beer Pong Dream lived on in my third victory! I am now 3-0.

Also, after much coaxing and a little help from some Jagermeister…I busted out the yo-yos and treated my guests to an eye opening, mystifying show of fine motor brilliance!

Alan Smith was very glad he had good health insurance as I knocked a poker chip off his ear with the yo-yo after being roughly 20 sheets to the wind.